Today is my wedding anniversary.
On August 25th 2007, James and I got married at Manchester Registry Office, with a ‘party’ the following day for friends and family.
But just like many other brides looking forward to their day I also had a cloud hanging over me, that in my mind, was sure to ruin it.
My mum and dad were divorced.
Now let’s face it. That’s not unusual these days. But I was overwhelmed with fear that the animosity would mean smiles would be fake, guests would feel uncomfortable around my family and there could even be rifts.
My dad was bringing his wife; my eldest brother hadn’t spoken to my dad since the ‘break-up’; and my mum still bore a grudge. No wonder I was feeling anxious.
On James’ side. No such conflict.
We hadn’t been together long before I had found myself pregnant. James proposed pretty quickly too and I was deeply in love so I’d said yes and a wedding day was rushed together on the smallest of budgets in no time at all.
And so also hanging over me was my own insecurity that his family and friends thought ‘it wouldn’t last’.
So that morning when I woke up there was part of me that was dreading the day ahead.
But instead of letting those fears ruin my day I decided I was going to be true to myself and I was going to be brave.
I wanted to show each and every person that day I was unafraid.
I was a successful woman who’d found her man and was ready to commit to him for the rest of my life.
But actually as fate had it. It was easier than I thought it was going to be.
My brother’s daughter had fallen off her scooter that morning and had to go to A&E, so him not talking to my dad in years was one less thing I had to worry about.
And then my dad fell ill. And he also had to go into hospital.
I was distraught of course that my dad was not going to give me away. But there was also some relief too. And my brother Chris stepped up and into my dad’s role and made me very proud.
Now although I didn’t want my day to unfold in such unexpected circumstance, it did mean that I didn’t have the worry about my mum and my dad being around each other. So I could relax.
And about us not lasting …. well we proved any doubters wrong because through ups and downs, through good times and bad, James and I are together and happier than ever.
With two gorgeous little boys.
So here’s my message for anyone with any fears. Put them to the back of your mind… Just roll with it. Go with the flow.
It is YOUR day and you only have THAT ONE DAY, so don’t let anything get in your way of having the best day of your life.
Because, let’s face it. The hard work begins the following day and the years after, making a successful and happy marriage.